Riding solo in the City of Joy @500 bucks!

Let's face it, we all get to a point where we want to be just alone. We're out of money, excitement and probably friends. Yes, it's hard to believe but I guess that's the harsh reality. But, there is a silver lining. Look around you'll find a huge cultural heritage. From each chaiwala to some fried stuff street vendor. They all got their stories. Stop feeling pity for yourself and get out of house. Just wear a comfortable outfit and put your sneakers on. That's all what you really need when you're pretty low on budget but still want to 'treat yourself' with cheap thrills. Here's my own Hitchhiker's Guide to our Galaxy, our "Kokata" kolkata and thats too under ₹500 ($10)

No matter where you stay whether it's mainland Kolkata or across the Ganges, Howrah, the rising city. You can always find the heart of it, the lovely tea-stalls. You'll not only find tea but also different people's opinions on different subjects.

Start off your day with nearest 'chai wala' with tea and some biscuits. If you'll watch carefully you'll find an old rusty, corrugated iron benches. You can considers yourself as a very, very lucky fellow if you can find Kachori (Kochori) in the same stall, otherwise you have to walk a little more down to the road and you'll find it. You will find yourself amongst the elders of the universe who are busy giving pervasive looks towards female joggers. And the minute you see them, they'll started babbling, as you were some lecherous disrespectful ass and will call you 'Ossobbho'. This 'Bhaarer cha' and 'biskits' along with a plateful of Kochoris will cost you ₹30.

After that, walk down by gullies and try to avoid main road. Just keep your eye out for local rickshaw puller or some over-friendly dada if you want some stuff to make your day. And you'll find 'Maashi' the only woman you want to see when you want to get high on life. Just be casual, go and ask, "Maal hobe ki?" They all got it cover. The cost varies but normally you would get enough 'stuff' for ₹50. We all love joint family, don't we?

Next stop, just ask natives about local cinema hall. They place where you can find the Hindi/Bengali posters from late 80's to early 2000's but we all know it's basically porno. No matter the poster reads, 'Mukaddar ka Sikandar' or 'Sholay', we all know the real deal. And try not to look petrified or surprised if you find the floor unrealistically sticky! That ticket to pornhouse won't cost you more than ₹20.

In here Bengal, no one can dare to miss the lunch and you won't be disappointed if you're looking for something which someone may say, 'bang for bucks'. From Tollygunge to Burrabazar, from Clive's Row to Dalhousie, you'll find abundance of food choices. Just name a cuisine and you shall find it here. If you're a non-vegetarian then surely you're in for a treat, and if you're a vegetarian that won't be a problem too. Punjabi, Bengali, Marwari, South Indian, any refreshments or any roadside lunch wouldn't be hard on your wallet too. You'll find many middle class, office going guys who're just trying to grab a bite after a tedious morning. Well, you can have the main meal course in less than ₹100! Ain't that amazing?!

Our very next stop will only going to appeal to you if you're an avid reader! But, nonetheless, you'll find it charming. College Street, the bookworm's heaven! You'll find everything from the classic, Arthur Conan Doyle's Sherlock Holmes to Amish Tripathi's Naga trilogy, from Joint Entrance to IAS, from engineering to medical, you'll find everything. And if you can't find any book then probably it hasn't been publish yet! Love 'em or hate 'em, but you may end up buying one of them, and I know you will!

Wait, I'm forgetting something right? Commute! If you're in Kolkata and still not using its classical way to commute then you're doing it in wrong way. Let it be pulled rickshaws (taana rickshaws), trams or ferry services, it's pure gold in its own way. Being in a haath rickshaw will itself take you back in feudal times. Trams will give you the view if pre-Independence India and Ferry will give you nothing except the deep glance into your own soul. Not only this, but you'll find people from different background, all trying to reach somewhere. For ₹50 you can avail them all.

By this time, it'll be evening already. Have some 'jhuri-bhaaja' and 'lebu cha' on the way and seek any ghat (riverside), which is an absolute beauty. All those man-made structures on the bank of Ganges just seem like icing on the cake. Remember the weed from the very start? It's probably the best time if not the safest time to take it out, make a joint and poof!! You're close to the universe as if 'U' and the 'You'niverse are both the same. Lines have been blurred out.

A day well spent!
Take a commute to your home and you may find many souvenirs or gift shops on the way. Stop by to buy something to remind you that you did survive it on your own when nobody was by your side!